Argggggghhh

[eggchan]

なぜ私は日本人と話すと落ちつけないの？？

悔しい！！

、、、何か、、、日本語のレッスンにいて、ハイチの地震のためにarashi_onがお金を集めてるというイベントを説明していみたけど、ゴチャゴチャになって凄い恥ずかしかった。後、レッスンから戻ってきて頭で完璧に言いたいことを言った。もう！！

何か間違うのがものすごい怖がるかもしれないから、普通に話せない。どうやってこの不安を克服すればいいの？？なぜちゃんと日本語で話せなくてもお金を払うの？

I am so frustrated with myself. Ugh.

Comments

[eggchan.livejournal.com]

D: you changed your name!!

I'm so glad to see that I'm not the only person like this. The most frustrating part to me is that I wasn't like this by the time I left Japan and now I'm back to this way all over again. I suppose I'm in a better state though, because before I honestly couldn't say ANYTHING except for "私の名前は、、" etc. All the basic stuff, because it just wouldn't come out of my mouth. Now it's not coming out of my mouth because I'm not THINKING in Japanese like I used to while I was there. :\ It's hard to do it when you have no one to talk to. Argh!

[ohmyghost.livejournal.com]

I DID, i'm sorry bb :( H-HOPEFULLY YOU WILL COME TO LOVE THIS NEW VERSION OF ME?

You are definitely not alone! I guess it's that huge difference between study and immersion, huh? :( I think someone said it in the comments (stalk, stalk) but I talk to myself in Japanese a lot, and like -- imagine what Arashi's answer to questions might be before they answer them on their tv shows. ngl, I try and force myself to think in Japanese so much that sometimes I have to remind myself I'm allowed to think in English. FORCE IT UNTIL IT AIN'T FORCED NO MORE BB ♥